Remove this ad
avatar

oldnwise

Posts: 177 Member Since:03/06/10

#161 [url]

Sep 30 12 11:44 AM

not at all vague or confusing , at least to me.  I get it. I always feel like I'm on a soapbox too in these and other boards, though it is never my intention.
first off, though, my family, well they are who put the whole let's pretend thing in my personality in the first place.
since my parents are no longer alive, it is only my older sister who still does that.  Truth is almost painful for her.

what I am finding for me, that is helpful in interacting with others, is to think before I talk. That is a big challenge for me.   The other big challenge for me has always been that I feel uncomfortable in silence with others-
it is quite odd, that I actually don't like to talk "too much" because if I said that to anyone who has spent time with me, they'd likely laugh out loud at that !
but it is really that I have (historically) felt it is "my job" to fill the silence; to keep the conversation going !

And me hating it the whole time.  Then, there are the conversations with people who are are way "out there" mentally speaking , and again, I feel like I need to be super polite, super nice , to make that person feel good.
even when it makes me uncomfortable , makes ME feel bad.

has anyone else ever done that?

I am as I said, working on it.  I am not doing that anymore.  Now I say, "I am busy" or "nice chatting but I have to go now" and for the most part, I am learning to not feel guilty about that.

I am the kind of person people like to open up to.  Sometimes I enjoy that ; I just need to find a balance.
I feel that the second part of my life, is all about finding balance.
thanks for letting me blather on.

"When I was 40, I used to wonder what people thought of me. Now, I wonder what I think of them." ~Brooke Astor~

Quote    Reply   
Remove this ad
avatar

oldnwise

Posts: 177 Member Since:03/06/10

#162 [url]

Sep 30 12 11:50 AM

oh you are kidding me! that is a trip, you saying that !  I will quote you what he says :
"I am a vast warehouse of worthless knowledge"
It is actually one of his famous sayings that makes me laugh and love him so much.
thanks for reminding me about that.
He has Alzheimers and that alone is a difficult thing but thank God, he still has his sense of humor , though sometimes I now need to be reminded to laugh.  If it wasn't for the humor and laughter , I would completely lose it.
I love that you said that

"When I was 40, I used to wonder what people thought of me. Now, I wonder what I think of them." ~Brooke Astor~

Quote    Reply   
avatar

wayovermyhead

Posts: 4,350 Member Since:07/16/11

FORUM ADMINISTRATOR

#164 [url]

Sep 30 12 12:40 PM

oh you are kidding me! that is a trip, you saying that !  I will quote you what he says :
"I am a vast warehouse of worthless knowledge" [image]
It is actually one of his famous sayings that makes me laugh and love him so much.
thanks for reminding me about that.
He has Alzheimers and that alone is a difficult thing but thank God, he still has his sense of humor , though sometimes I now need to be reminded to laugh.  If it wasn't for the humor and laughter , I would completely lose it.
I love that you said that [image]

-oldnwise


????  Interesting but can't figure out what you mean??

FORUM ADMINISTRATOR
Wishing You Best In Love & Life 
wayovermyhead

Quote    Reply   
avatar

wayovermyhead

Posts: 4,350 Member Since:07/16/11

FORUM ADMINISTRATOR

#165 [url]

Sep 30 12 1:05 PM

@Dharma and oldnwise....I can relate to both post...and appreciate the disclosure.  With this I will tell you a few of my weaker people pleasing traits that no matter how bad I want to change it....I always bow out in the last moment of truth.  I am bad to sit back and see a person's motivating and driving force and yet see their short comings too.  I can be very upstanding and promotional in a friends character assets but I suck in dealing honestly in their defects.  I am not saying it is my job to call em down on it every time etc...but sometimes it really matters when I allow someone who is a friend get away with things that can affect me or other innocent victims...so I am dishonest at times in my approach and/or maintenance of any developed friendship in that I will not step on or about any of their gray areas. 

For instance I have this one friend for 30 years...I know she has a spending money issue...it gets her in trouble all the time (I usually step in and help her is where I am affected as it will make me come up short somewhere financially and she gets back on track because I do so and I am off track then and there.)  I avoid opportunities to help her because I may have to hurt her to help her.  I don't mean to and it is such a cheat to her but instead of making waves because she would freak if I ever told her how I perceive it all...  I just listen (which sometimes appears I am validating her bullshit etc...) and I walk lightly.  One other issue I hate I avoid with her is she is convinced she treats her step children just like she does her own and OMG there is nothing further from the truth and yet because of past encounters...I just listen and then feel like crap that I did not stand for those kids which btw are no longer kids so I have already missed the boat on this.  I know it is unfair to me, her and others involved but, our friendship has been harmed in unavoidable ways that I avoid what I can.

I know it's wrong, unfair etc...and I hate even disclosing it as I am convinced any chastising you might throw my way would go in one ear and out the other meaning I would hear it but do nothing about it.  No disrespect meant.  I respect all of you....

FORUM ADMINISTRATOR
Wishing You Best In Love & Life 
wayovermyhead

Quote    Reply   
avatar

misty

Senior Member

Posts: 141 Member Since:08/19/11

#167 [url]

Oct 1 12 4:38 AM

@oldnwise, I have had a big problem doing exactly what you said!  I don't like to talk a lot, but feel like I have to fill silences...I feel the need to be overly nice to people even when it makes me uncomfortable...everything you said totally resonated with me!  It's something I have always kind of known about myself but have realized it even more the last couple of years as I've been working on all my issues.  It's amazing to me how deep the need to please other people goes.  It's nice to know I'm not alone! :)

I'm sorry to hear about your husband having Alzheimer's, but am glad that he still has his sense of humor!  I know it isn't easy, and hope that you continue to find reasons to laugh with him and share those little moments of happiness.

Quote    Reply   
avatar

imthe1guy

Posts: 6 Member Since:10/04/12

#169 [url]

Oct 5 12 2:28 AM

Me to , boy i sweated alot ,first 2 months i'm on the end of my 3rd month there and i feel great, i never woke up this early ,Well  since my daughter was born, and  that was 14 years ago, wow now i'm a so called morning person that sweats, but not as much as the first 60 days.thank goodness, 

live n let die

Quote    Reply   
avatar

ccourtneymac

Senior Member

Posts: 1,407 Member Since:09/19/11

#170 [url]

Oct 5 12 3:03 AM

Well, a brief update, I see the doc next Thursday for the body temperature issues and the burning.  My clinic nurse said four other women had complained about that recently...

Quote    Reply   
Remove this ad
avatar

shoshauney

Senior Member

Posts: 451 Member Since:07/07/12

#171 [url]

Oct 5 12 6:40 AM

Maybe u can get some relief!!

Learn a lesson from your dog. No matter what life brings you, kick some grass over that sh*t and move on!

Quote    Reply   
avatar

dharmageddon

Senior Member

Posts: 408 Member Since:09/03/12

#172 [url]

Oct 5 12 6:53 AM

At least you are not alone! I am glad you are getting checked out and hope nothing is serious and you get your temperature regulated everywhere!

All you touch and all you see is all your life will ever be. -Pink Floyd

Quote    Reply   
avatar

ccourtneymac

Senior Member

Posts: 1,407 Member Since:09/19/11

#173 [url]

Oct 6 12 1:42 AM

I am really afraid of being pre diabetic.  There is NO WAY you can live the life I have and not have some chickens come home to roost, meaning there has GOT to be a tab coming due!  Right...?

Quote    Reply   
avatar

sapphire76

Posts: 3,678 Member Since:02/22/10

FORUM ADMINISTRATOR

#174 [url]

Oct 6 12 3:56 AM

    I am really afraid of being pre diabetic.  There is NO WAY you can live the life I have and not have some chickens come home to roost, meaning there has GOT to be a tab coming due!  Right...?

-ccourtneymac

I had pre diabetes, which manifested in the form of insulin resistance, which made it impossible to lose weight, and made me sweat loads.
Even though I totally changed my diet it still progressed to type II diabetes, which I have to take meds for now.

Quote    Reply   
avatar

wayovermyhead

Posts: 4,350 Member Since:07/16/11

FORUM ADMINISTRATOR

#175 [url]

Oct 6 12 5:45 AM

I totally understand the concept of worry that the tab will come due....I have been amazed to find that my liver enzymes are not a mess after all the the pills ending in "apap" I have ingested.  I keep waiting for that day.....when all comes due (and will it be payable?) is such a big fear of mine. 

FORUM ADMINISTRATOR
Wishing You Best In Love & Life 
wayovermyhead

Quote    Reply   
avatar

ccourtneymac

Senior Member

Posts: 1,407 Member Since:09/19/11

#176 [url]

Oct 9 12 6:16 PM

Well, thoroughly miserable the last couple of days.  The itching and burning is unbelievable, and the OTC stuff is not working very well.  I never knew how bad dryness could be.  Wow.

I think when I go see the doc on Thursday I am going to request Depo-Provera, a hormone shot that makes your monthly cycle go away.  I have to get it every three months, which is better than being miserable four or five days out of the month PMSing.

It stands to reason that if you do not get a monthly, you don't get the hormonal fluctuations that come with it.  Right, ladies?

Quote    Reply   
avatar

dharmageddon

Senior Member

Posts: 408 Member Since:09/03/12

#177 [url]

Oct 9 12 7:44 PM

I was on Depo for years; loved it! You can tell that it is starting to wear off the last week or so but you can get the next shot up to 2 weeks early so that is my suggestion. It helped my everything. No migraines, no PMS, no period actually but unlike with the pill it does not feel like you have shit building up in your uterus dying to get out. It never builds up a lining bc no eggs ever drop. Since no eggs come out to play, they are never fertilized so they don't need a good, bloody, spot to make home and grow in.......neat eh? I will tell you it took forever for my cycle to return to any kind of normalcy after depo or it could have been all the heroin. I can never answer that for sure but just fyi. You are right though, no more mad hormone spikes so everything seems to run smoother in my opinion.
I am sorry your cookie is like the Sahara baby. I think you will get relief on Thur. Did you try those Replens things? I have heard good stuff about them. My stepmother LOVES the estrogen vaginal cream, but you probably aren't in need of that yet.
Good luck babygirl.I know that is a kind of misery nobody can deal with for long.


All you touch and all you see is all your life will ever be. -Pink Floyd

Quote    Reply   
avatar

wayovermyhead

Posts: 4,350 Member Since:07/16/11

FORUM ADMINISTRATOR

#178 [url]

Oct 10 12 1:39 PM

Just because your periods have stopped (either by medication and/or age) does not mean that your hormones are about to go away. Hormones (and their deficiencies) stay with us regardless of the age. In fact, one of the reasons why a post-menopausal woman still has PMS is because of the decline of some of the key hormones. Some women develop PMS for the very first time after they enter menopause.  Removing the hormones is the only eradication and that can only be met in removal of ovaries.....

FORUM ADMINISTRATOR
Wishing You Best In Love & Life 
wayovermyhead

Quote    Reply   
avatar

dharmageddon

Senior Member

Posts: 408 Member Since:09/03/12

#179 [url]

Oct 10 12 8:37 PM

I think I read that somewhere too. When hormones are close to slowing to a slug's pace they have a year or so (often longer, sometimes shorter) of being very erratic and unpredictable in many women--hence using exogenous hormones to render those little bastions of chaos into some kind of submission! I find the entire endocrine system, hormones, all the chemistry that is a human being unbelievably fascinating. When you really stop & think we are not much more than our hormones. They dictate everything we do -- it is overwhelming what all they are responsible for!

All you touch and all you see is all your life will ever be. -Pink Floyd

Quote    Reply   
avatar

skeetoz

Full Member

Posts: 72 Member Since:10/08/12

#180 [url]

Oct 11 12 4:20 AM

Yeah I am a furnace too! Esp at nights i wake with sweat

Quote    Reply   
Remove this ad
Add Reply

Quick Reply

bbcode help